Megan Fox Is In A Call Of Duty CommercialBy toddNovember 04, 2013

 

I'll never really understand why people play video games with headsets on and pretend they're soldiers or whatever, because soldiers usually don't get their guns taken away by their moms if they fail another chemistry test. Weird. Anyway, there's a game where you can pretend you're a soldier out now and it's called Call Of Duty: Ghosts, and they put Megan Fox and her fine ass in the commercial because they realize who actually plays these games. If you're pretending you're an elite operative fighting a technologically-superior global power to survive after America has been destroyed, I guess pretending Megan Fox thinking that would be attractive wouldn't be that much of a stretch. Happy shooting, nerds.

  I'll never really understand why people play video games with headsets on and pretend they're soldiers or whatever, because soldiers usually don't get their guns taken away by their…

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Justin Bieber Loves Brown HookersBy toddNovember 04, 2013
Justin Bieber Loves Brown Hookers

 

I guess he's still trying to bang away the pain of Selena Gomez leaving him, because Justin Bieber is now banging every brown hooker he can throw money at while on tour (see pics of the daring escape here). Good times. Page Six reports:

Justin Bieber tried to sneak out of a brothel in Brazil while covered in a sheet Friday — but photographers caught him red-handed. The 19-year-old pop star and a friend spent more than three hours in the popular whorehouse Centauros in Rio de Janeiro — before leaving with two women, sources said.  He jumped into the back seat of a car while the women, who covered their faces, were put in SUVs and escorted back to his hotel. Bieber’s security team covered him with a bedsheet bearing the sex den’s logo as he walked out of the establishment — and one of his handlers sprayed photographers with water, demanding they stop snapping, sources said.  The fotogs, who had been tipped off about Bieber’s visit to the whorehouse, confirmed it was the singer through his security team. The Biebs was also identified by his gray wraparound wrist tattoo, which is visible in some photos, and his signature sneakers, sources said. Bieber was later kicked out of the hotel for breaking rules, the Brazilian news Web site EGO reported. But another source insisted that Bieber left because hordes of fans mobbed the place, a creating a “security issue.’’ Sources at the hotel claimed he and his crew had for days been partying, doing drugs and disturbing people, according to EGO…..

Bieber’s trip to the brothel comes after he allegedly spent the night with a hooker in Panama last week, the Panamanian newspaper Cronicas reported. A prostitute told the paper that Biebs paid her $500 for sex after the two met at a nightclub in Panama City. He took her back to his hotel room and the two smoked weed, she told the paper. After the sex, he returned her to the club, where she met back up with friends, she said.

We really can't be sure if he had sex with any hookers, because this is all circumstantial and speculative of course. He probably made them recite lines from Wizards Of Waverly Place while jerked off a cried. And then they painted each others toenails or something. Then maybe they braided a pony's hair. Then Justin made them watch while he did ten pushups. Whoa, ten?! Such a big boy!

  I guess he's still trying to bang away the pain of Selena Gomez leaving him, because Justin Bieber is now banging every brown hooker he can throw money at…

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