A Blonde Model Is In A BikiniBy kathyJune 18, 2012

Our photo service says this is Candice Swanepoel and it obviously isn’t because her hips and waist are actual in proportion. I have to admit I’m not able to name off every blonde model out there on sight (although this one has boobs, which shortens the list considerably) so I’m at a loss. (Erin Heatherton? No…) So today in the comments instead of posting ten creative variations of the n-word, how about you do me a solid and come to a consensus on who this is. See, beautiful women will bring us all together and heal the world. Just like Rodney King wanted.

Our photo service says this is Candice Swanepoel and it obviously isn’t because her hips and waist are actual in proportion. I have to admit I’m not able to name…

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Rodney King DiedBy kathyJune 17, 2012

Rodney “Can’t We All Just Get Along” King was found dead this morning. So far the only details available are that his fiance found him in their pool, so assumable he drowned. He was 47.

For those of you younger than 25, in 1991 King was beaten by four cops after acting a bit odd when they pulled him and his friends over. They fractured his skull and broke a couple of his bones. The officers were tried for excessive use of force and were found innocent, leading to the six day LA race riots in which 53 people died and more than 2,000 people were injured.

Indirectly King will always be tied to the continuing Civil Rights movement, and I don’t really want another “cancer” incident on my hands, so I find it difficult to make a joke about (more…)

Rodney “Can’t We All Just Get Along” King was found dead this morning. So far the only details available are that his fiance found him in their pool, so assumable…

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Awww YeahBy toddJune 15, 2012



Every time I do a post about Ashley Greene, I get a lot of comments saying “I don’t see the appeal”. And that’s fine. Look, being gay was just how you were born and you can’t help that. I get it. But please understand that doesn’t change the fact that I want to beat her cervix like an escaped slave. I just wanted to clear this up because apparently there was a misunderstanding. Get over here, silly. Give Todd a hug.

Every time I do a post about Ashley Greene, I get a lot of comments saying “I don’t see the appeal”. And that’s fine. Look, being gay was just how…

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Miranda Kerr’s Pockets are Annoying, LinksBy kathyJune 14, 2012

Scarlett Johansson is still talking about how hard it is being beautiful [The Superficial]
Cheryl Cole needs to be more famous than she is now [Popoholic]
Nathalia Ramos makes bike riding sexy [Hollywood Tuna]
Julia Stiles is see-through, still alive (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
How about some blind items? [Dlisted]
Elvis‘s granddaughter is in a bikini (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Salma Hayek is a 45 year old stripper [Celebuzz]
Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough probably aren’t having sex, it all makes sense now [Celebitchy]
Erin Andrews defies gravity (NSFW site) [The Nip Slip]
What your drink says about you [COED Magazine]
10 internet drinking games [College Humor]
42 (hot) reasons to care about the Euros [The Chive]
Maria Menounos (more…)

Scarlett Johansson is still talking about how hard it is being beautiful [The Superficial] Cheryl Cole needs to be more famous than she is now [Popoholic] Nathalia Ramos makes bike…

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Courteney Cox Filed For DivorceBy toddJune 14, 2012



This is probably the most amicable divorce in the history of Hollywood. People reports:

The actress filed divorce papers on the same day as Arquette’s June 8 filing in Los Angeles Superior Court. Cox’s filing, which surfaced the day after her ex’s papers, cites the same reason for the split and requests the same custody arrangement. Like Arquette, Cox, 47, cites irreconcilable differences and seeks joint legal and physical custody of their 8-year-old daughter Coco. Cox, who also requests to drop “Arquette” from her last name, is representing herself without lawyer, just like her former significant other.

This concludes this boring story. So, how are you? How’s your day? We never take time to talk anymore. Is that a new dress? Wow, your hair looks great.

This is probably the most amicable divorce in the history of Hollywood. People reports: The actress filed divorce papers on the same day as Arquette’s June 8 filing in Los…

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Hilary Duff Looks Very HealthyBy toddJune 14, 2012



Hilary Duff had her kid four months ago, so I’m not really sure what the hold up is here. The baby weighed like 7 pounds, so it’s unclear why she gained 107. Here she is yesterday waddling around LA scavenging for food or crying or whatever it is women who just had a baby do. I don’t know. I just know it includes the $1 menu at several points during the day.

Hilary Duff had her kid four months ago, so I’m not really sure what the hold up is here. The baby weighed like 7 pounds, so it’s unclear why she…

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Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Mom DiedBy toddJune 14, 2012



“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Can’t stop, won’t stop.” – cancer

Patricia Hewitt, beloved mother of actress Jennifer Love Hewitt and Dr. Todd Hewitt passed away yesterday at age 67 from complications due to cancer,” Jennifer’s rep told RadarOnline.com. “Her family mourns her loss. She was an angel to all who knew her and they are grateful she is now in a better place. They ask for privacy at this difficult time.”

Well, this sucks. Thirty-three years old and desperate for a husband and your mom dies of cancer. She’s in a bad emotional place right now, so it’s probably a good time to bring up the subject of anal.

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Can’t stop, won’t stop.” – cancer “Patricia Hewitt, beloved mother of actress Jennifer Love Hewitt and Dr. Todd Hewitt passed away yesterday at age 67 from complications due to…

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This Should End WellBy toddDecember 06, 2011

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I nicknamed my dick ‘Nikon’ LOL.”

Every shitty actor in Hollywood is in New Year’s Eve, the sequel to the equally shitty Valentine’s Day. So of course Lea Michele and Ashton Kutcher were cast. Every time I see Lea Michele dressed up like this, I always wonder where the rest of the contestants in the evening gown portion of the Jewish Transvestite Pageant are, then I realize she’s the only one competing. But that doesn’t matter. Because Ashton Kutcher will literally fuck anything. No, really. Anything. NASA could announce they just found signs of vagina on Mars and he would immediately be on Priceline checking Mars’ hotel ratings.

“I nicknamed my dick ‘Nikon’ LOL.” Every shitty actor in Hollywood is in New Year’s Eve, the sequel to the equally shitty Valentine’s Day. So of course Lea Michele and…

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Jesse James Is Still An Asshole Pt. IIBy jessDecember 06, 2011

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Jesse James is back on American Chopper. And he’s blaming his exes for him being an asshole. Radar Online reports:

“I became a big shot and married some Hollywood actress and didn’t talk to anybody anymore, so I feel bad,” James says at the beginning of the episode. His reference to America’s Sweetheart Sandra Bullock as “some Hollywood actress” is sure to rile fans of The Blind Side star, and not exactly endear James to viewers. James creates a stainless-steel “middle-finger” bike which is apparently the first motorcycle he’s personally built in five years and he explains his reason for returning to TV. “I feel obligated to reconnect with all these people and show ’em that I’m still the same fabricator motorcycle guy. I’m not what I became.” It’s not clear if James is blaming Bullock for “what he became,” but their marriage imploded over revelations he’d had numerous affairs.

To be fair, we don’t know the details of his marriage to Sandra Bullock other than the fact that he banged a bunch of skanks behind her back (and behind Kat Von D’s). But we do know that he has a tattoo on his right palm that says “Pay up, sucker,” so it’s safe to assume his left hand is the only one giving him love anymore. Touch ups take a while to heal.

Jesse James is back on American Chopper. And he’s blaming his exes for him being an asshole. Radar Online reports: “I became a big shot and married some Hollywood actress…

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Johnny Depp Is Wanted By The LAPDBy toddDecember 06, 2011

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Because his bodyguards beat up a handicapped lady. God, those handicapped people with all their rolling around and not using proper hand signals. TMZ reports:

The LAPD has some questions for Johnny Depp — and now, they’re trying to track the actor down for an interview …. after his bodyguards allegedly beat up a disabled woman last week. TMZ broke the story … 52-year-old Robyn Ecker filed a police report after the Iggy Pop show in L.A. Thursday night — claiming she was minding her own business when she accidentally danced too close to Depp’s table … and his bodyguards tackled her. Robyn claims she was seriously injured during the alleged attack — and even went to the hospital to get herself checked out. Law enforcement sources tell us, the LAPD would like to speak to Johnny and his bodyguards about the police report — and are currently making attempts to interview all of them. So far, no word from Johnny’s rep.

We give Johnny Depp a lot of love on this site, but he’s said some pretty dumb shit recently and now apparently his bodyguards think they’re in some wheelchair athlete intramural rugby league. Not to be an asshole, but the article said she was disabled then immediately followed up with “she was minding her own business when she accidentally danced too close to Depp’s table.” I’ve never seen a disabled person dance, but I assume Johnny Depp’s bodyguards thought she might have been possessed by a demon. Honest mistake.

UPDATE: This was just sent in by a reader. Thanks, Cesar! Even though you drowned that puppy that one time.

I actually witnessed this happen in front of me at the show. That woman is full of shit. She was WASTED like no tomorrow and made her way to were Depp was and mind you he had his kids and girlfriend with him. She grabbed him by the back of his pants, pulling him and the bodyguard grabbed her, but she just would not let go and got really angry, spilling everyone’s drink and went as far as scaring the living hell out of his kid, making her cry. She was being pulled away and started fighting back, which resulted in the venues security to get involved and she was STILL being all violent. They got her taken away and Depp and everyone with him left the place. About 10 minutes later, the same woman went back to the place were everything happened, looking for him and same shit happened again but this time she got kicked out. The end.

Because his bodyguards beat up a handicapped lady. God, those handicapped people with all their rolling around and not using proper hand signals. TMZ reports: The LAPD has some questions…

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