Miley Cyrus Went To The 2013 Teen Choice AwardsBy toddAugust 12, 2013

So yeah, here's Miley Cyrus at the 2013 Teen Choice awards. Like Justin Bieber and every white rapper, Miley's blackface is more subtle that it was 100 years ago and is more inferred. But if CNN said today that we're lynching black people again, Justin Bieber and Riff Raff would be wearing American flag polo shirts and bolo ties when they announced their Freedon Tour with Toby Keith and Lee Greenwood, and Miley would release an album of Amy Grant covers before you finished reading this. In the meantime, it's just Miley being what her record label's image consultants says Miley should be. Enjoy!

So yeah, here's Miley Cyrus at the 2013 Teen Choice awards. Like Justin Bieber and every white rapper, Miley's blackface is more subtle that it was 100 years ago and…

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Jessica Simpson Does LettermanBy toddMarch 12, 2010

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Damn, I am so normal right now, because Jessica Simpson showed up on David Letterman Wednesday night and she looked so fucking normal. I would bang that so normally, she wouldn’t know what two sides she ordered with her 3-piece. It’s not very often that a woman gets me this so normal, so I’m not really sure how to handle all these different emotions. Normally, of course.

Damn, I am so normal right now, because Jessica Simpson showed up on David Letterman Wednesday night and she looked so fucking normal. I would bang that so normally, she…

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Best Achievement In Trying To Make This Look HumanBy toddMarch 08, 2010

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I have no idea who Sarah Jessica Parker’s stylist is, but whoever she is, she might as well take a mummy to Urban Outfitters. Sure she can dress him up to make him look like he likes $10 PBR’s and giving looks of exasperated condescension to anyone who isn’t Communist, but it will be obvious to everyone at the coffee shop across the street from his art history building that he just might be an undead corpse whose body has been awakened by an ancient Egyptian curse. His lust for blood insatiable, his thirst for vengeance unleashed.

Splash News didn’t have 7 pics of this hag, so the last one is a picture of Molly Ringwald. Who looks like she needs Jake Ryan to bring her about 46 more candles:

I have no idea who Sarah Jessica Parker’s stylist is, but whoever she is, she might as well take a mummy to Urban Outfitters. Sure she can dress him up…

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