Taylor Swift was in Rhode Island to paddleboard this weekend, and as we can see, she's totally committed to wearing high-waisted things. Pants, shorts, bikinis, doesn't matter. If it's high-waisted, she will point at it and want to buy it. Especially if it leaves next to a relative of a boy she likes.
Sharknado, Syfy's instant masterpiece about a tornado filled with sharks and the actors who haven't worked since the 90s who fight them, is by far the most culturally significant film of our time. Even though the special effects were created on a free iPhone app and the continuity was like a conversation between Amanda Bynes and a toaster, Sharknado is a brilliant piece of cinema that succeeds because it is exactly what you expect it to be. Hilariously earnest in its terribleness. And about 70% of the terrible was any scene that included Tara Reid, because it was obvious that she was just fed Xanax and wine the whole time and right before the director said action, a person wheeled her out and helped her get her balance. She won't be back for the sequel. This is a sad day. TMZ reports:
Sources connected to the production tell TMZ … producers had a meeting this past week to discuss plans for the New York-based sequel — and the only actor they want back for round 2 is Ian Ziering. Of course, Ian slaughtered more sharks than anyone in the original — killing fish from Santa Monica to Beverly Hills and even into THE VALLEY!! Tara played Ian's estranged wife in the flick — and survived the massive shark attack (even when the sharks broke into her HOUSE!!) — but Sharknado 2 is not in her future. As for Ian, sources say both he and Tara scored around $50k for Part 1. Ian should rake in a lot more for the sequel. And good news … we're guessing he's available.
Sharknado 2 will the Empire Strikes Back of sharks in tornado movies, so they have to cast this right. My I suggest Candace Cameron as lesbian marine biologist who is running from her past. And Luke Perry as a renegade cop who is battling his inner demons and his ex-wife in court when the unthinkable strikes. And Alyssa Milano as an aging stripper who won't let this happen again. I've spent way too much time thinking about this.
Remember last year when Christina Aguilera would stab you in the throat for the last donut then drain you of your blood to cover her nachos? Well apparently she's been on a diet, because she showed up to NBC's TCA Summer Press Tour this weekend looking like this. "This" being more aesthically pleasing as to encourage penetration. Penetration from my penis. I'd put my genie in her bottle again AWWWW YEAH, SON. NAILED IT!
Paris Hilton Shops Braless in See Through Dress (NSFW site) [Taxi Driver Movie]
There Has Not Been Enough Attention Paid To Winnie Cooper’s Ass And That Is A Crime [The Superficial]
Jessica Biel Gets Bootylicious In Skin-Tight Jeans [Popoholic]
Miley Cyrus Nude For Marc Jacobs [Hollywood Tuna]
Spears Awkward Family Photo [Dlisted]
Kidd Kraddick Died [Fishwrapper]
Ireland Baldwin in her bikini (NSFW site) [Drunken Stepfather]
Eddie Redmayne was at the Giffoni Film Festival [Lainey Gossip]
Reese Witherspoon spent $1500 on a haircut. Repeat: $1500. On a haircut. [Celebitchy]
Nicole Richie Out On The Water in St. Tropez [Moe Jackson]
Hugh Jackman and his torso was too sexy for American moviegoers to resist over the weekend [Film Drunk]
Melissa Gorga is in a bikini [Celebslam]
The Worst Career-Ending Injuries In Sports [COED Magazine]
Aaron Paul Is a Gentleman Among Men [The Blemish]
Here’s The Hotel Room Amanda Bynes Trashed [Evil Beet Gossip]
Wes Bentley Joins Christopher Nolan’s Interstellar [Crave Online]
Lady Gaga teases ARTPOP with a new (naked) picture [Popbytes]
While her boyfriend AJ McCarron is trying to start a flame war with Johnny Manziel, because the NCAA can't keep Maziel poor like they do other athletes, Katherine Webb attended the ESPYS the other night and I completely forgot to post the pics. My apologies. But now that I have, if for some reason you have a penis and are attracted to women and wouldn't impregnate Katherine Webb just to say you did, go ahead and cut it off and give it up for adoption to a loving person who desperately wants one. Like Madonna or Drake.