Ke$ha Needs A Longer TongueBy toddJuly 07, 2010

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This picture of singer(?) Ke$sha covered in semen hit on Buzzfeed about an hour ago, but I wanted to make sure it wasn’t a fake, so I waited to post it. Then I realized the pictured included the words “covered in semen”, so I no longer cared. Mostly because if a girl lets you jack off on her and take a picture, you should marry her. I think Toni Morrison said that in a book somewhere.

This picture of singer(?) Ke$sha covered in semen hit on Buzzfeed about an hour ago, but I wanted to make sure it wasn’t a fake, so I waited to post…

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Lady Gaga Does Madison Square GardenBy toddJuly 07, 2010

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Lady Gaga took her utterly pretentious and tired act to Madison Square Garden last night where she shocked and wowed the crowd with fake blood and by grabbing her crotch the entire night. Fuck her for making me use the unisex term “crotch” on the site for the first time, and fuck her for being so horrifically ugly. At least Katy Perry is hot. Being hot is a good quality to have if all of your songs are about how many guys want to bang you. Looking like something that was found in alien wreckage at the bottom of the ocean puts a little hole in your theory. And stop grabbing yourself, bitch. All that tells me is that either you have a dick or wish you had one. Neither of those options are particularly attractive when you’re wearing panties that are four sizes too small.

Lady Gaga took her utterly pretentious and tired act to Madison Square Garden last night where she shocked and wowed the crowd with fake blood and by grabbing her crotch…

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Jessica Biel Does GQ ChinaBy toddJuly 07, 2010

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Here’s Jessica Biel’s hot ass in this month’s issue of GQ China. In related news, I was in First China in Cary yesterday. My order ready in ten minute, no waiting!

Here’s Jessica Biel’s hot ass in this month’s issue of GQ China. In related news, I was in First China in Cary yesterday. My order ready in ten minute, no…

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Kill Russell Brand LinksBy toddJune 30, 2010

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Russell Brand has to die [The Superficial]
Salma Hayek really needs to model our t-shirts [Popoholic]
Miranda Kerr upskirt [TaxiDriver Movie]
Forbes’ Top(less) 2010 Celebrity 100 Power List (you’ll want to see this) [COED Magazine]
Britney Spears might be abusing her kids. [Celebslam]
Leighton Meester vs. Jessica Alba. Really? [Egotastic]
Carolina “Pampita” Ardohain. My…God. [Heyman Hustle]
Christina Hendricks loves gaining weight [Cele|bitchy]
Paris Hilton packs light [Popeater]
Unfamous white guys are taking all the famous black chicks [Allie Is Wired]

NOTE: I just straight up asked for pics of your tits today, but my boy over at The Superficial is more of a gentleman and is looking for a new banner girl (you can enter here). He isn’t gay or anything, he just likes to look at women’s faces. I do to, but I just take their imprint off my pillow.

Russell Brand has to die [The Superficial] Salma Hayek really needs to model our t-shirts [Popoholic] Miranda Kerr upskirt [TaxiDriver Movie] Forbes’ Top(less) 2010 Celebrity 100 Power List (you’ll want…

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IDLYITW NewsBy toddJune 30, 2010

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UPDATE II: This will be closed for submissions on Friday, July 9th.

UPDATE: My inbox looks like a breast augmentation photo gallery right now. If you sent me an email asking me why your pic isn’t on FB, it’s because you did not give me permission to do so. Yes, I know, but that thing with your sister was different.

Yeah so, IDLYITW is toying with the idea of designing t-shirts for the site. I assume no guy would wear them unless he wanted his ass kicked, but what do you ladies think? Before we start moving on this bitch, we need to know if anybody would actually want to buy them. I posted this on Facebook yesterday and the response was a resounding yes as long as I make V-necks, spaghetti straps, camisoles and other girly crap, but we thought we’d cover all our bases here. If we get rolling on this thing, we’ll do prizes nd giveaways, so if you’d be interested, let us know in the comments. And anybody who sends in a pic with them wearing the shirt will be featured on the site if they want. If you aren’t, go shit in your hand because you are a miserable human being and God hates you. I’m just kidding, I love you. I’m not really sure about God. Now seriously, let us know in the comments.

Note: I also asked if anyone would be willing to model them for a free-shirt, and again, the answer was a resounding and erection-inducing yes. The banner pic is of a reader named Jennifer who couldn’t wait and wanted to start right away. If want to begin your journey to a free t-shirt and my free judgment of your boobs right away like Jennifer did, please email us at editor@idontlikeyouinthatway.com

UPDATE II: This will be closed for submissions on Friday, July 9th. UPDATE: My inbox looks like a breast augmentation photo gallery right now. If you sent me an email…

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God Bless Kelly BrookBy toddJune 30, 2010

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I wondered why bluebirds dressed me this morning and why I was able to slide down a rainbow to my truck from my balcony to the parking garage, but now I know why. Kelly Brook is still in Barbados. Can’t we just go ahead and put her on the dollar bill already? Why do we need George Washington anyway? “George Washington doesn’t have big tits,” a person from 1781 was quoted as saying. “He doesn’t have big tits at all.”

I wondered why bluebirds dressed me this morning and why I was able to slide down a rainbow to my truck from my balcony to the parking garage, but now…

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Larry King Is Kinda RetiredBy toddJune 30, 2010

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Charlie Rose wannabe Larry King has announced that cable TV’s most irrelevant talk show is going off the air after 25 years. King will remain with CNN and appear on “occasional specials”. Us Magazine reports:

After 25 years, his program Larry King Live will wrap up sometime this fall, the 76-year-old confirmed in a statement Tuesday. Citing a desire to spend more time with his family, King said “I’m looking forward to the future and what my next chapter will bring, but for now it’s time to hang up my nightly suspenders.”

The article doesn’t go on to say that Larry King will spend his time writing his memoirs, discussing how the new musical act Color Me Badd has a bright future, and coming to life every night when the museum closes.

Note: Your discerning eye may have noticed that the banner pic is not Larry King but Playboy Playmate Jessica Burciaga. Why no picture of Larry King? I really hope you just didn’t say that out loud.

Charlie Rose wannabe Larry King has announced that cable TV’s most irrelevant talk show is going off the air after 25 years. King will remain with CNN and appear on…

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Kelly Brook Changed Bikinis. Again.By toddJune 29, 2010

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Day 2 of Kelly Brook Barbados Bikini Hotness Bonanaza is upon us, and if at all possible, if somebody could taser her when she tries to leave then point her to the nearest bikini shop, I would appreciate it. If this was Bulgaria, she’d already be blindfolded and hit with a cattle prod when her name was called at the auction, so I don’t see what the hold up is. Dammit, Barbados! Do I have to do everything myself?!

Day 2 of Kelly Brook Barbados Bikini Hotness Bonanaza is upon us, and if at all possible, if somebody could taser her when she tries to leave then point her…

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Ashley Greene Is In MadridBy toddJune 29, 2010

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Ashley Greene was in Madrid to promote the movie about an ugly chick’s battle between necrophilia and bestiality yesterday, and it’s pretty obvious at this point that Ashley Greene is physically unable to not look hot. It can’t be done. She could be pulled from airplane wreckage or be cut out the stomach of a shark and I’d still cum at least once.

Ashley Greene was in Madrid to promote the movie about an ugly chick’s battle between necrophilia and bestiality yesterday, and it’s pretty obvious at this point that Ashley Greene is…

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