Kim Kardashian Still Managed To Do ThisBy toddFebruary 26, 2018
Kim Kardashian Still Managed To Do This

 

Kim Kardashian looks like she put on one of Bruce Jenner’s old suits that Caitlyn forgot to throw away and still managed to show us like 89% of her breasts. She’s really gonna have to start wearing her spine outside her body if she wants to show us something new. Maybe when her show gets canceled.

 

  Kim Kardashian looks like she put on one of Bruce Jenner’s old suits that Caitlyn forgot to throw away and still managed to show us like 89% of her…

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Emily Ratajkowski Is Doing Naked Stuff Again, Because Why Not?By toddFebruary 23, 2018

A post shared by Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) on

 

You’re not going to believe this, and I had a hard time believing it myself, but Emily Ratajkowksi got naked for something. This time it was Vanity Fair. This is very empowering to me. I was going to write more, but I’m on social media and I see we’ve literally gone from “the increasingly militarized police are brutally killing POC at will” to “only police should have military weapons” in a matter of two months. I don’t know about you, but as a brown man in America, I’m ready for this utopia!

 

A post shared by Emily Ratajkowski (@emrata) on Feb 20, 2018 at 1:07pm PST   You’re not going to believe this, and I had a hard time believing it myself,…

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Natalie Portman Is Very Sorry About Signing That Roman Polanski PetitionBy toddFebruary 21, 2018
Natalie Portman Is Very Sorry About Signing That Roman Polanski Petition

 

A white woman named Kate wrote an article for BuzzFeed called, “Natalie Portman Is The Woke Actor We Need Right Now,” and I assume Kate still tweets that Hillary Clinton is the rightful President everyday and posted about Black Panther is now her favorite movie. In the article, buried way down at the bottom, she was asked about the infamous Roman Polanski Petition, where over 100 Hollywood industry people asked Switzerland to release the director after they arrested him on a warrant for raping an underage girl in 1977.

In case you forgot, this was included in the petition:

“We demand the immediate release of Roman Polanski,” urges the petition. “Film-makers in France, in Europe, in the United States and around the world are dismayed by this decision… It seems inadmissible to them that an international cultural event, paying homage to one of the greatest contemporary film-makers, is used by police to apprehend him.”

Pretty fucking gross, right? Natalie Portman would like you to know she didn’t really read it and it was a  mistake.

I very much regret it. I take responsibility for not thinking about it enough. Someone I respected gave it to me, and said, “I signed this. Will you too?” And I was like, sure. It was a mistake. The thing I feel like I gained from it is empathy towards people who have made mistakes. We lived in a different world, and that doesn’t excuse anything. But you can have your eyes opened and completely change the way you want to live. My eyes were not open.

Right, a mistake you made in 2009 that you just want people to know was mistake because you’re woke now or whatever. Sure, okay.

 

  A white woman named Kate wrote an article for BuzzFeed called, “Natalie Portman Is The Woke Actor We Need Right Now,” and I assume Kate still tweets that Hillary…

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Jennifer Lawrence Did The ‘Red Sparrow’ PhotocallBy toddFebruary 20, 2018
Jennifer Lawrence Did The ‘Red Sparrow’ Photocall

 

According to Mueller, we’re pretty much all Russian bots now because we mostly get our news from memes, so I’m not sure if a movie glamorizing the effectiveness of a Russian spy is what Hollywood needs to be sending out into the world right now, but here we are. Jennifer Lawrence attended the Red Sparrow photocall with her boobs out to distract us from the fact that she’s a Russian spy in the movie. She really has a career in politics.

 

  According to Mueller, we’re pretty much all Russian bots now because we mostly get our news from memes, so I’m not sure if a movie glamorizing the effectiveness of…

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Here’s The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit 2018 Launch EventBy toddFebruary 15, 2018
Here’s The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit 2018 Launch Event

 

The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit 2018 Launch Event was in New York City last night, and everyone was there. Like the five people you might recognize. Just realized Alexi Ren was asked to be in the issue, and think it probably has to do with her classic model face and not her 12M Instagram followers. Her 12M Instagram followers wasn’t even a factor in her being chosen by something that requires to be shared on social media. Good for the SI Swimsuit Issue team.

 

  The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit 2018 Launch Event was in New York City last night, and everyone was there. Like the five people you might recognize. Just realized Alexi Ren was…

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Selena Gomez Is Doing GreatBy toddFebruary 14, 2018
Selena Gomez Is Doing Great

 

Selena Gomez left a mental health facility last month and came out with bangs, so things might be a little touch and go now. But she did attend New York Fashion Week and had looks from happy to somewhat happy. She also wore a black leather jacket over a dress. That’s a pretty hot look. Or it might not me. Not really sure. I shop at Kohl’s.

 

  Selena Gomez left a mental health facility last month and came out with bangs, so things might be a little touch and go now. But she did attend New…

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Kim Cattrall Really Hates Sara Jessica ParkerBy toddFebruary 12, 2018
Kim Cattrall Really Hates Sara Jessica Parker

 

I’ve never seen an episode of Sex and the City, but Wikipedia says it, “follows the lives of a group of four women—three in their mid-thirties and one in her forties—who, despite their different natures and ever-changing sex lives, remain inseparable and confide in each other.” BREAKING: That’s not true. Like that’s not true at all.

 

Basically Kim Cattrall’s brother died last week and Sarah Jessica Parker tried to comment it on it. Kim Cattrall then nuked her from orbit.

 

 

Sarah Jessica Parker looks like she’s been cursed by an evil witch while simultaneously being an evil witch in real life apparently. Not sure if seeing Sarah Jessica Parker being dragged to the end of space and time was something you wanted to see today, but here it is, I guess.

 

  I’ve never seen an episode of Sex and the City, but Wikipedia says it, “follows the lives of a group of four women—three in their mid-thirties and one in…

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Ashley Greene Is Here AgainBy toddFebruary 12, 2018
Ashley Greene Is Here Again

 

Hello. How’s your Monday morning going? Oh, really? Sorry to hear that. Anyway, I haven’t posted about Ashley Greene in a while, because it was just a phase that you all had to go through with me. But she’s here again and I’m posting these, because that “what would you look like as the opposite sex?” thing is going around on Facebook today for some reason, and I still think this is what Michael Jackson’s would look like if was alive and was on Facebook.

 

  Hello. How’s your Monday morning going? Oh, really? Sorry to hear that. Anyway, I haven’t posted about Ashley Greene in a while, because it was just a phase that…

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Alexandra Daddario Is Also Fighting AIDSBy toddFebruary 08, 2018
Alexandra Daddario Is Also Fighting AIDS

 

Alexandra Daddario looks like an outdated sex doll who continually picks horrible film projects for herself, but she too, doesn’t want people to have AIDS. Maybe that’s why she’s a sex doll. You can’t get AIDS from them. This is her at the 2018 amfAR Gala in case the AIDS thing didn’t clarify that.

 

  Alexandra Daddario looks like an outdated sex doll who continually picks horrible film projects for herself, but she too, doesn’t want people to have AIDS. Maybe that’s why she’s…

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Halsey Is Against AIDSBy toddFebruary 08, 2018
Halsey Is Against AIDS

 

Hey, did you know that Halsey is half white and half black? I just found that out last week. I kinda don’t believe it, because she has a flat and and her music sucks. And she hasn’t tweeted about Black Panther yet. Like, how do you call yourself black if you don’t tweet about Black Panther and how it is the best superhero movie starring a mostly black cast and how it was a soul changing experience to see black people in a fictional movie? You can’t, if we’re being honest. But it is good to see that Halsey is half black and is trying to help with AIDS by attending the 2018 amfAR Gala New York. AIDS is pretty bad in Africa. I blame the Pope.

 

  Hey, did you know that Halsey is half white and half black? I just found that out last week. I kinda don’t believe it, because she has a flat…

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