Chadwick Boseman Covers ‘Rolling Stone’By toddFebruary 19, 2018
Chadwick Boseman Covers ‘Rolling Stone’

 

Black Panther is making all the money right now and Disney has pledged to take 25% of the profits to help the black community. Haha jk, Disney is going to keep all of it because they are a soulless media conglomerate. Wakanda profits forever. But Chadwick Boseman and director Ryan Coogler are profiled (in a good way) in the latest issue of Rolling Stone, and that’s really great. You should also see the movie, because it’s also pretty great except the CGI.

 

  Black Panther is making all the money right now and Disney has pledged to take 25% of the profits to help the black community. Haha jk, Disney is going…

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Joaquin Phoenix Is Probably The New JokerBy toddFebruary 09, 2018
Joaquin Phoenix Is Probably The New Joker

 

Joaquin Phoenix already turned down the role of Lex Luthor in Batman v Superman, so maybe he’ll agree to be The Joker in a movie directed by the dude who did The Hangover movies. Sure to be a big hit. Big hit.

Joaquin Phoenix is in talks to play the Clown Prince of Crime in Warner Bros. and Todd Phillips’ untitled Joker origin movie. While studio negotiations are not yet underway, Phillips has made it clear that Phoenix is the top choice to star and sources now tell Variety that, after thinking it over, Phoenix has agreed to the role. WB had no comment. Phillips is on board to co-write and direct the movie. Phillips had met with Phoenix before the new year and was just waiting for the studio’s go-ahead, sources say.

If you’re DC and you see that Margot Robbie was the best part of Suicide Squad, then you see that Wonder Woman was your best movie to date, then you see that Black Panther is about to break every Marvel record, this first thing you should think to yourself is, “hey, we should make another Joker movie.” Another Joker movie is sure to turn things around. Especially if he has CGI scars.

 

  Joaquin Phoenix already turned down the role of Lex Luthor in Batman v Superman, so maybe he’ll agree to be The Joker in a movie directed by the dude…

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‘Venom’ Has A TrailerBy toddFebruary 08, 2018
‘Venom’ Has A Trailer

 

The trailer for Venom just came out, and if you care, “Venom” is a sentient alien who bonds with a human host (Tom Hardy) and it’s some kind of villain/anti-hero who fights Spider-Man. Cool. It’s a Sony movie, so what we can predict is that all the characters will only drink Coke products and Dunkin’ Donuts, and Papa John’s pizza will have a bearing on the plot at some point. Also, Michelle Williams is in this wearing a terrible wig. I hope she remembered to ask to get paid. Riz Ahmed, one of the characters whose name you don’t remember from Rogue One, is also in this as something. I don’t know. Woody Harrelson is also in it because he’s in everything. Also, this looks pretty generic.  Can’t wait.

 

  The trailer for Venom just came out, and if you care, “Venom” is a sentient alien who bonds with a human host (Tom Hardy) and it’s some kind of…
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‘Black Panther’ Had A Seoul PremiereBy toddFebruary 06, 2018
‘Black Panther’ Had A Seoul Premiere

 

Black Panther drops in 10 days, and it’s set to break Marvel box-office records unless the people who it was made for don’t bootleg it and try to sell me a copy on the MARTA. So let’s not do that. In the meantime, they had a premiere in Seoul last night and Lupita Nyong’o looked like a black angel. It’s cool because Koreans have probably never seen a black person up close.

 

  Black Panther drops in 10 days, and it’s set to break Marvel box-office records unless the people who it was made for don’t bootleg it and try to sell…

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‘Solo: A Star Wars Story’ Has Two TrailersBy toddFebruary 05, 2018
‘Solo: A Star Wars Story’ Has Two Trailers

 

After the original directors were fired and Ron Howard reshot like 90% of the movie, two trailer for Solo: A Star Wars Story have dropped. They added “A Star Wars Story,” in case you didn’t know a trailer with Chewbacca and the Millennium Falcon in it was about Star Wars. It’s great! Because it has things you recognize! This will be a great movie and not a money grab from a corporate conglomerate at all. The trailer also has Donald Glover as a young Lando Calrissian. He was the black guy in the old Star Wars movies if you don’t count Darth Vader.

 

 

  After the original directors were fired and Ron Howard reshot like 90% of the movie, two trailer for Solo: A Star Wars Story have dropped. They added “A Star…
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“Ant-Man and the Wasp” Has A TrailerBy toddJanuary 30, 2018
“Ant-Man and the Wasp” Has A Trailer

 

I haven’t seen the first Ant-Man because why would I, but the sequel, Ant-Man and the Wasp, has a trailer that came out today and this is it. Kate plays the Wasp. Haven’t seen her in a while. I guess this is a good thing. Paul Rudd and Michael Douglas are also in it. I don’t know more much about this movie, I’m sorry.

 

  I haven’t seen the first Ant-Man because why would I, but the sequel, Ant-Man and the Wasp, has a trailer that came out today and this is it. Kate…

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“Black Panther” Had A PremiereBy toddJanuary 30, 2018
“Black Panther” Had A Premiere

 

It’s only 17 days until Black Panther opens, so that means 17 days until thousands of think pieces on your timeline by white people calling it racist or so woke they’re hallucinating black people saying it isn’t black enough. Remember when Wonder Woman wasn’t feminist enough because it didn’t include every subset of feminism? Good times. Anyway, the reviews are already great, and normally I wouldn’t believe anything these reviews say, but Black Panther isn’t a DC movie. So I’m pretty sure, at the very least, it will be entertaining and make sense and nobody will have a CGI lip.

 

  It’s only 17 days until Black Panther opens, so that means 17 days until thousands of think pieces on your timeline by white people calling it racist or so…

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Margot Robbie Did A PremiereBy toddJanuary 23, 2018
Margot Robbie Did A Premiere

 

Margot Robbie just got nominated for Best Actress for I, Tonya, but she’s in Australia right now at the premiere of I, Tonya. You’d think Australians would have seen this movie by now since Margot Robbie is Australian. Maybe it has something to do with their gun laws. I don’t know. Robbie is rocking the rib cage cleavage thing now and I’m not sure how to process this, but if she ever wanted a half brown baby I could look past that if needed.

 

  Margot Robbie just got nominated for Best Actress for I, Tonya, but she’s in Australia right now at the premiere of I, Tonya. You’d think Australians would have seen…

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Here’s A First Look Of “Ant-Man and The Wasp” If You’re Into ThatBy toddJanuary 17, 2018
Here’s A First Look Of “Ant-Man and The Wasp” If You’re Into That

 

Not sure why we’re getting a new Ant-Man movie, but the first look Ant-Man and The Wasp dropped yesterday. The Wasp’s outfit has an inverted dick and balls on it. Great design, guys. This is all I have to say about this.

 

  Not sure why we’re getting a new Ant-Man movie, but the first look Ant-Man and The Wasp dropped yesterday. The Wasp’s outfit has an inverted dick and balls on…

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Timothee Chalamet Hates Woody Allen NowBy toddJanuary 16, 2018
Timothee Chalamet Hates Woody Allen Now

 

Timothee Chamalet (that’s how he spells it), who is getting Oscar buzz for his performance in Call Me By Your Name, will be seen in Woody Allen‘s upcoming A Rainy Day In New York along with Rebecca Hall. He regrets that decision now, obviously. This decision probably came after months of thought and a crisis of conscience lol jk.

 

 

Man, cool apology. One could make the case that you wouldn’t have to apologize if you didn’t accept the role in the first place. One could also make the case that you’re only making this apology to preemptively stop the 4,000 hit piece about you if you happen to win the Oscar. So…fuck off? Yeah, fuck off.

  Timothee Chamalet (that’s how he spells it), who is getting Oscar buzz for his performance in Call Me By Your Name, will be seen in Woody Allen‘s upcoming A…

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