Apparently the Jingle Ball is still happening, so when she's not pretending to masturbate for attention, Miley Cyrus is on stage for attention. Can I just go ahead and say it looks like it probably stinks? Can I say that? That's a thing I can say, right? I'm really not up to speed on feminine hygiene products, but I get the feeling she'll get some as a stocking stuffer. Having sex with Miley Cyrus would be something you'd have to do to cross a bridge in a fable.