When Katy Perry isn't in a relationship, she doesn't leave the house without her tits out and ready to be motorboated by passersby. But when she's in a relationship, like now, she suddenly remembers that she was raised to love Jesus and Jesus doesn't want all of his brides walking around without feigned modesty. So when she went to the UNICEF Snowflake Ball last night, people were forced to remember that she has a completely average face and a lazy eye. Jesus, why you gotta ruin everything, bro? Damn. Chill.