Kris Jenner Is A Wonderful Human Being

Not we needed anymore proof that Kris Jenner is a horrible person or a demon who needs plastic surgery and Botox to live, her kids' former nanny, Pam Behan, has just released the book, Malibu Nanny: Adventures of the Former Kardashian Nanny, in which she goes into great detail to let everyone know that Kris Jenner is a horrible human being. Radar Online reports:


The time Pam went grocery shopping and didn't get broccoli because Kris didn't put in on the list:

Pam says while she was on good terms with Bruce, Kris was “tenacious and does not take ‘no’ for an answer.” To illustrate her point, Pam writes of one particularly upsetting incident. She says, “Kris gave me a shopping list and told me to go to the grocery store. When I got home, Kris said, ‘Where is the broccoli?’ I told her broccoli was not on the list. She immediately lost her temper, yelling, ‘I can’t f*cking believe you f*cking forgot the f*cking broccoli!'.Pam tells Star, “I was completely shocked. At that moment Bruce stuck his head out the door and said, ‘Kris, why are you talking to Pam like that?’ Kris just yelled, ‘Never mind – I’ll get the f*cking broccoli for you!’ Things were very awkward after that.”

The time Kris called Khloe fat at every possible opportunity:

Pam says Kris was especially hard on Khloe. “Kris used to poke fun at Khloe and her weight issues. She was mean.” Another source told Star that Kris “would say things like, ‘You aren’t allowed to have cookies, Khloe. You are getting a little chubby.’ It definitely left a scar on Khloe’s psyche.”

The time Kris made her kids physically fight over designer clothes because they weren't allowed to wear the same thing twice:

Pam says Kris encouraged the girls to dress well, but that they would wear an outfit only once or twice before giving it away. “Kris liked to flaunt how much money they had,” Pam says. She also paints the girls as being incredibly self-centered. “The girls were all so selfish and shallow – a family of fakes! They would have knock-down, drag-out fights over designer clothes. By the end, they would be crying and bleeding. It was bad!”

I've never seen one single episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, and ev en though that's a lie, I never saw where they keep her coffin. Or does she just sleep under a mound of fresh earth? What about crosses? Do they work? What about silver? Garlic? Somebody check wikipedia and let me know.

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