Pippa Middleton Could Be Going To Jail



So, remember like for 15 minutes in 2011 the world went apeshit over Pippa Middleton claiming she had the best butt on the planet and if she found a quarter on the ground it was covered by every media outlet followed by a poll question asking if you liked her outfit or OMG really, really liked her outfit? Then remember when all that stopped because everybody realized she in reality has a flat ass and a busted ass face and was only really relevant because her sister married her cousin? Good. Well, in 2012, she rides around in France with a guy who waves semi-automatics handguns at people while she drives. I wonder what she was wearing?!! US Magazine reports:

Pippa Middleton could face jail time if prosecuted in a shocking new case involving a paparazzi photo taken in Paris on Saturday. The 27-year-old socialite and entrepreneur, sister of Duchess Kate and sister-in-law of Prince William, was in the front passenger seat of an Audi convertible in the French capital as the driver pointed a semi-automatic handgun at photographers. A witness in the gun-waving incident charged a formal complaint with Paris police; Middleton (plus her pal, fashion mogul Arthur de Soultrait, who was in the backseat of the car) will be summoned if authorities determine there is enough evidence for prosecution. “If the evidence points to [Pippa Middleton’s] involvement, she will be prosecuted,” a judicial source told Us Weekly. “Anybody involved in the illegal use of a handgun in public is liable to arrest and interrogation.” If the pistol turns out to be real, the unidentified man waving the gun faces up to seven years in prison; even if the weapon is fake, he faces two years.

Terrorists have basically occupied France already, so their extreme anti-terrorist laws seem a little late now, but if Pippa would’ve been smarter she would have done this in L.A. She could have waved the gun around in a daycare and shot every homeless person on Sunset, and at worst, the Los Angeles County Sheriff would have thrown her a parade or sentenced her to a mani/pedi.

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