One of my ex-girlfriend’s texted me last week with “Ok so Jennifer Love Hewitt is starring in a show on Lifetime about being a single mom who is a happy endings massage therapist? Have you written about this yet?! LOL!!” (that’s even funnier when you realize she’s half Chinese and that I used to call her vagina “the wok”). I really wasn’t going to watch it, but the first print promos were released yesterday and goddamn. Anybody in the marketing campaign meeting who suggested anything other than what’s in these pictures probably got punched in the face then dragged out into the parking lot and stoned to death.