When the news of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver‘s separation was announced, people wondered what could have broken up a 25-year marriage. Well, fucking your housekeeper then getting her pregnant ten years ago and making your wife believe the housekeeper’s husband was the father might do it. TMZ reported:
Arnold Schwarzenegger fathered a baby with a member of his household staff, and that is what sent Maria Shriver packing … and right into the office of a powerful financial adviser to get her affairs in order to end her marriage, TMZ has learned. Sources say Maria was distraught after learning Arnold pulled a John Edwards. The baby mama worked for the family for two decades, retired and received a severance package, according to the L.A. Times. The baby was born more than a decade ago, but until recently Maria thought the father was the woman’s husband at the time. Schwarzenegger told The Times, “After leaving the governor’s office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago. I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry.”
Whatever. This is pretty much a non-story. I mean, he was married to Maria Shriver for 25 years. Of course he was fucking somebody else. I’m sure she’s a sweet lady, but Shriver looks like something you have to kill in a video game to advance to a new level. The only way I’d have sex with her is if my dick had frostbite and she was the closest thing to me.