Kim Shot First

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Kim Kardashian has been frolicking in bikinis lately, sexily playing the victim after it was reported that she and Reggie Bush split because he was cheating on her. Maybe it’s because she was banging Kanye West the whole time.

You’ve been hearing that Kim and Reggie broke up because she was pressuring him to get married. Well that WASN’T IT!!! MediaTakeOut.com learned the REAL reason Reggie Bush dumped Kim Kardashian – because she SLEPT with Kanye West!!! Here’s what happened. According to an EXTREMELY RELIABLE insider, Reggie and Kim were on the road to getting married. Reggie even went so far as buying her a ring, and was waiting for the right time and place to pop the question. Well one day, Reggie was using Kim’s laptop when all of a sudden some IMs came over . . . from Kanye WEST!!!. And Reggie played it cool and answered them like he was Kim. And come to find out that Kanye and Kim were GETTING IT POPPIN for many months – ALL BEHIND REGGIE’S BACK!! The insider told MediaTakeOut.com that Reggie confronted Kim about the text messages, and she ADMITTED to having the affair. Once Reggie heard that . . . he LEFT HER AZZ!!!

MediaTakeout brings the fuckin fury with the caps lock key and uses the phrase, “LEFT HER AZZ!!!”, so it’s unclear if any of this is true. I choose to believe it is, because they tell me it’s from an EXTREMELY RELIABLE insider. You hear that? EXTREMELY RELIABLE!!! Just like the emergency pregnancy test I had in my nightstand!!

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