Jennifer Aniston is a Joy To Work With By todd March 31, 2009

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Monday was the first day of shooting on Jennifer Aniston’s next bomb, The Baster, and today, yes today, guess what kind of story is out? You’ll never guess! OK! Magazine reports:

Perhaps Jen was trying to stay in character between takes, because witnesses tell OK! wasn’t any friendlier when the cameras stopped rolling. “Jen kept mostly to herself,” one on-set source reveals. “She didn’t talk to anyone during the breaks.”…”In the morning, the cast and crew had to wait to start filming without Jen because she asked for extra time to finishing blow-drying her hair,” reveals one source. And when the lunch bell rang, not only did Jen not deign to eat her Cobb salad in the company of her new co-workers, she actually had herself driven to her trailer so she could eat alone! “Jen refused to walk even a step outside the restaurant during the break for lunch,” says an insider. “She had her car pull up right next to the restaurant so she could be driven less than a block to her trailer to avoid photographers.”

Okay, so either all the tabloid magazines have secret meetings in an underground volcano lair to make up stories about this chick or Jennifer Aniston is just an insufferable bitch. Every story about this chick is the same. Every one. Johnny Depp, an actor who, by their own admission, has made other actors starstruck, is widely known for being extremely generous and sometimes overly accommodating to his fans (a few examples here and here). Jennifer Aniston can’t even condescend to talk to the crew. And please keep in mind, this is Jennifer Aniston we’re talking about. If actors were cars on a racetrack, Aniston would be a wagon pulled by a cat.

Monday was the first day of shooting on Jennifer Aniston’s next bomb, The Baster, and today, yes today, guess what kind of story is out? You’ll never guess! OK! Magazine…

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It Won’t Be Long Now By todd March 31, 2009

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Lindsay Lohan can’t get hired at Medieval Times right now and she’s been living off her girlfriend’s money for the past year, so how did she afford that $115,000 Maserati? Oh yeah, she’s gonna do porn. TMZ reports:

If you ever thought, “How the hell did Lindsay Lohan pay for that $115,000 Maserati?” — here’s your answer … she didn’t.The guy crazy enough to trust the exotic ride to a person with more traffic drama than Britney Spears is Dennis DeSantis — a porn king who’s produced such legendary classics as “Origami So Horny” and “Butt Sluts.” No word on why Dennis lent LiLo the car — but we’re told there’s no XXX catch to drive the ride. And as for the damage Lindsay’s assistant caused to the whip, we’re told Double D isn’t even sweating it — and will let Linz drive the car after it’s been repaired — an estimated $10,000 job.

Please, this dude didn’t just loan Lindsay Lohan his Maserati like some valiant prince helping a fair maiden. He did it because everybody knows Lindsay has really big tits and puts more meat in her mouth than Kobayashi, so he’s trying to close this deal hard. If it takes a Maserati, fine. If it takes a few donkeys dying, fine. Actually, the article didn’t really mention donkeys, but the article did say “Lindsay Lohan” and “porn” so I just kinda assumed.

Lindsay Lohan can’t get hired at Medieval Times right now and she’s been living off her girlfriend’s money for the past year, so how did she afford that $115,000 Maserati?…

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Andre 3000 Got Arrested By todd March 31, 2009



Andre Benjamin (Andre 3000), one half of the legendary rap group, Outkast, was arrested outside of Atlanta on Saturday after his Porsche Carrera was clocked at 109 mph on I-75. 44 miles over the speed limit. AllHipHop reports:

According to a report by local ABC-affiliate WSB-TV Monday afternoon (March 30), the Grammy Award winning rapper/actor was arrested by a member of the Henry County Police Department’s Highway Enforcement of Aggressive Traffic Team early Saturday morning. The officer stated that he clocked Andre 3000, born Andre Benjamin, at 109 mph, 44 mph over the 65 mph speed limit along that stretch of I-75. Benjamin was arrested for the danger he posed to other drivers. “Traveling that fast along 75, you’re passing people as if they’re standing still,” explained Henry County Police Captain Jason Bolton. “It’s an accident waiting to happen.”

Man, he seems like he was in a hurry. You know what might help? The Millemuim Falcon. It made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs.

And if you like fish and grits and all that pimp shit:

Andre Benjamin (Andre 3000), one half of the legendary rap group, Outkast, was arrested outside of Atlanta on Saturday after his Porsche Carrera was clocked at 109 mph on I-75….

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Well, Good Morning Kelly Brook By todd March 31, 2009

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Longtime IDLYITW favorite, Kelly Brook, was in Barbados this weekend and, uh, damn. Megan Fox, seriously? Why didn’t anybody stop me? Kelly Brook has returned like some conquering hero, slaughtering all enemies at the gates of my pants. I’m not even joking when I say I’d hump this chick so fast I’d look like a tuning fork. You hear that? It’s a middle C!

Longtime IDLYITW favorite, Kelly Brook, was in Barbados this weekend and, uh, damn. Megan Fox, seriously? Why didn’t anybody stop me? Kelly Brook has returned like some conquering hero, slaughtering…

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Maybe I Was Wrong By todd March 31, 2009

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I got a lot of hate mail for my last Shawn Johnson post, in which I suggested the guy who was arrested for stalking her had no taste. I was told that she was “hot” and if I didn’t like her I was “gay”. Now looking at these pictures of her on the set of Dancing With the Stars, I think I might have been mistaken. Man, look at that hot body. If I was a frontier settler I wouldn’t even be able to contain myself right now. As soon as I saw her chop that firewood and fix that wagon wheel, let’s face it, I’d be in love.

I got a lot of hate mail for my last Shawn Johnson post, in which I suggested the guy who was arrested for stalking her had no taste. I was…

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Links For When Green B*tches Got You Blue By dave March 31, 2009

The picture of Playboy model Diora Baird as an Orion Slave Girl in the new Star Trek makes me want to find old pictures of her to remember how hot she really is. [BadAndUgly]

It’s not often you get a good burn in the Senate. [EbaumNation]

Miley Cyrus is a home town girl. From some home town you’ve never heard of. Because it doesn’t exist and both Miley and I are liars. [FatbackMedia]

Rachel Ray learning to talk differently doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll be less annoying. But have hope. [ImNotObsessed]

Katy Perry: “There are seven thousand other restaurants in L.A. besides the Ivy. If you don’t want to be photographed, have your assistant pick up a chopped salad for you.” [ICYDK]

I agree in the sense that I would like to punch (more…)

The picture of Playboy model Diora Baird as an Orion Slave Girl in the new Star Trek makes me want to find old pictures of her to remember how hot…

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Christina Aguilera Didn’t Think This Through By todd March 31, 2009

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Christina Aguilera performed at the birthday party of the fat gay dude whose site is secretly written by ghost writers, and on the way in (banner pic), she looked kinda hot. While walking on stage (below), she looked like a gay club emcee. I’m not saying all gay club emcees dress like this, I’m just saying, at first glance, she looks like she’s about to sing a duet with a guy wearing satin shorts and a cop hat and holding a microphone that looks like a dildo. And I might be mistaken, but a midget in a feather boa and devil horns rides out on a tricycle at some point handing out sparklers.

Christina Aguilera performed at the birthday party of the fat gay dude whose site is secretly written by ghost writers, and on the way in (banner pic), she looked kinda…

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Dear God By todd March 30, 2009

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Not to sound mean, but my unbridled hate for the Kardashians has made me appreciate the idea of car bombs, and I hope their father (this dude) is in a special place in hell, but damn this chick has giant boobs. Boobs are awesome in general, but huge boobs are like an eagle soaring in the heavens or a kid with MS finishing a sack race. They are miracles to be beheld with awe and wonder. In fact, instead of a swastika, the Nazis should have made their symbol a pair of DDs in a wet t-shirt. Who knows, things may have turned out differently.

Not to sound mean, but my unbridled hate for the Kardashians has made me appreciate the idea of car bombs, and I hope their father (this dude) is in a…

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Britney Spears is Over Her Points By todd March 30, 2009

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As well all know, Britney Spears’ life revolves around moderation and healthy life choices, so of course while on tour, the food on her private jet is going to reflect that. Star Magazine says:

Her Gulfstream IV jet is full of junk food and yapping dogs! “The plane is stocked with Twinkies, beef jerky and M&Ms,” a source tells Star. “When she’s done, she just throws the wrappers on the floor.” Running around through the mess are two puppies!” They scoot around like crazy,” says the source.

Some people might think because this is Star that this story is completely made up, but please keep in mind that this is what it looks like when Britney invites a magazine to her house, so you can only imagine the unadulterated trans fat orgy that goes on when nobody is around. Of course her plane looks like this. You’d have a better chance of finding a wormhole or hatching dinosaur eggs on that thing that you would a celery stick and a bottle of water.

Anybody remember when Britney looked like this? I think I speak for everyone with a penis when I say, “Hey, Britney. Fuck you.”:

As well all know, Britney Spears’ life revolves around moderation and healthy life choices, so of course while on tour, the food on her private jet is going to reflect…

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Links To Rat Out Your Daddy For By dave March 30, 2009

The above private voicemail was supposedly recorded in January and is, thus far, the only concrete evidence that Daddy Spears might be as controlling as Adnan and Sam Lutfi were.

Paris Hilton loves a lot of stuff. [EbaumNation]

Every time you think J.Lo is dead and you never have to think about her again, she pops up in some ridiculous outfit. At this point, someone’s gonna have to off her, straight up. [LaineyGossip]

Nic Cage
is looking grunge-y on the set of his new flick. [BadandUgly]

I think this tight dress on Sara Underwood couldn’t be tighter without ripping off her sweet, sweet body. Site NSFW. [DrunkenStepfather]

Madonna’s pilgrimage to get another child continues. [ICYDK]

Holly Madison is anti-airbrushing, which is fine (more…)

The above private voicemail was supposedly recorded in January and is, thus far, the only concrete evidence that Daddy Spears might be as controlling as Adnan and Sam Lutfi were….

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