Ben Affleck Sneaks Large Woman/Small Whale To Hospital

It looks like the Affleck clan is soon to be one more as this morning Ben Affleck did his best to clandestinely sneak Jennifer Garner to Ceders-Sinai in Beverly Hills. Some people say the pregnant body is a beautiful thing, and maybe it’s just my inability to reproduce, but I hesitate using the word “beautiful” to describe anything that involves a lot of swelling. Swelling with love and procreation, but still swelling. That’s the opinion that ensures I’ll never have children and – at the rate things are going – never touch a woman again.

Once again, Ben Affleck barely bests me. Curse you Affleck!

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