Lindsay Lohan is Still in Rehab



Despite earlier reports that Lindsay Lohan was out of rehab, Michael Lohan, Lindsay’s father, says the actress is only temporarily leaving Cirque Lodge for a movie role but will be returning to Utah for outpatient care. The Insider says:

Michael Lohan tells “The Insider” today that daughter Lindsay Lohan will remain in Utah for the next week receiving outpatient care. Lindsay completed her stay at the Cirque Lodge Treatment Center Friday. Michael, in Utah with Lindsay, says she will head back to L.A. shortly to work on a movie for several weeks and then will likely return to Utah to continue her outpatient program.”

Yeah, this will help. Lindsay already fell on a penis in a bathroom stall and failed a drug test while actually locked in rehab, so outpatient care is sure to be a success. Especially when she gets back from an enabling Hollywood movie set. She’ll be totally cured. In no time Lindsay will be flying kites with orphans and giving makeovers to homeless people. What? No? She’ll be kneeling in a circle of dudes with her eyes closed and her mouth open? Well, aren’t we a basket of sunshine.

Nice thighs, fatty:

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