Megan Fox is Really Really Pretty

Jessica Biel is too busy being stuck up and kissing girls to return my calls, so I’m leaving her and moving on to Megan Fox. It should be easy once I figure out how to break Brian Austin Green’s enchanted spell, because there’s no way this dude would be able to lick on this without help. I mean, is he still even famous? At best, he should be on television in a cowboy hat, standing next to a giant inflatable Uncle Sam and telling me how I could get 0% financing on this new Ford F-150. He’ll take my trade no matter how much I owe!

Related Posts: