These are Michael Jackson’s Kids

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When I was in 2nd grade, my neighbor brought her doll up to my tree house and said it was our baby. We named her Hannah. I went to work everyday to my job as a spaceship commander and secret agent while she took care of baby Hannah. I don’t know what ever happened to my neighbor, but this is just my romantic lead in to say that baby Hannah looked like me about as much as Michael Jackson’s kids look like him. You see, because Hannah was made of straw and cotton. Michael Jackson’s kids were made by two white people. Michael Jackson is white now, but according to mosquitoes fossilized in amber, DNA doesn’t change. If these were really Michael Jackson’s kids, they wouldn’t look like they were about to go stand under a parasol and sip iced tea during the polo match. They would look like this. Sorry Mike, you can’t bleach semen. No matter what Hitler told you in your dreams.

Note: The top photo is Prince Michael II (“Blanket”) and the bottom photo is Prince Michael I and Paris Jackson.

Image and story source: TMZ