Jennifer Lopez Needs To Get Slapped

Even though she was only one of the many stars to attend the lavish Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes “wedding,” Jennifer Lopez apparently thought the day was about her. Us reports:

Tom Cruise and Holmes kindly arranged for a private plane to bring some of their more famous friends to Italy for their wedding. But a source tells Us Weekly that, hours before Jada Pinkett Smith, Leah Remini and Jerry Maguire director Cameron Crowe boarded the chartered 757 to Rome, “Jennifer Lopez sent her assistant to secure seats by laying her belongings on all the best seats!” Lopez also flew her hairstylist, Ken Paves, into Rome and set him up at the posh Hotel Hassler to do her hair for the big day. Meanwhile, it’s supposed to be the bride’s special weekend, but the singer made sure that all eyes were on her at a group dinner at the restaurant Nino on Thursday night. Says a source, “The November 16 welcome dinner was supposed to be casual. But J.Lo, of course, wore a gown. So much for casual.” And the special treatment didn’t stop there. At 2:33 a.m. in the wee hours after the wedding, Lopez, 37, had a waiter sneak two doggie bags to her and husband Marc Anthony, 38, as they were on their way to the airport to return to the States.”

If Jennifer Lopez couldn’t trick people into thinking that she has an unbelievable ass, she’d be doing nails or cleaning my hotel room. She has no discernible talent, yet she’s by far the biggest bitch in Hollywood. Every story you hear about her is the same. I’d never advocate violence against women (unless they ask), but if you see Jennifer Lopez walking down the street, remember blades don’t need reloading.

J-Lo and corpse at Friends Of The LA Free Clinic Annual Dinner Gala Nov. 20: