Jessica Biel Can Kick Your Ass

If you were an evil genius and I was Superman, you wouldn’t have to bother with all that silly kryptonite, just toss me a hot girl with a great ass. I’d almost guarantee that whatever scheme you have going on with that big laser and those bionic sharks would go off pretty much as planned, unless you waited about two more months and tossed me Jessica Biel. By that time, she’d be the Hulk. And it would be pretty awkward to watch Superman trying to talk the Hulk into anal.