According to ET Online, Orlando Bloom and Kate Bosworth decided to call it quits for the 700th time.
Sources close to the former couple tell ET that Orlando and Kate have decided to go their separate ways. The couple’s rep could not be reached for comment.”
A penis can only penetrate a popsicle stick for so long before the pain becomes intolerable. Well, there’s that and you realize you’ve been starring opposite (hotter than you) Johnny Depp for too many years and you just don’t feel handsome anymore. Not even handsome enough to date a pretty corpse. Not even when you make her wear a Johnny Depp mask while you have sex – especially when the afterglow features tweezers and hydrogen peroxide.
Tubby on August 16th: