David Spade Loves Leftovers

David Spade is feeling the wrath of Denise Richards after the Showbiz Show star called the actress a backstabber amid reports of Richards’ romantic involvement with Richie Sambora. Spade, who is reportedly dating Heather Locklear, said Locklear was “home nursing the knife wound in her back” when asked how the actress was doing. A source close to Denise Richards said:

David is notorious for preying on married women like Heather Locklear and Rebecca Romijn and Krista Allen, who goes back and forth between David and George Clooney . . . And Heather was seeing David last year.”

Wait, did they just say that Krista Allen goes back and forth between George Clooney and David Spade?!? I wasn’t a psychology major, but Krista Allen’s parents must have locked her in closets with wolverines as a child, because how in the hell do you stand in Clooney’s bathroom wiping the Astroglide off your thighs and get turned on thinking about David Spade? If I was Heather Locklear I’d have a hard time figuring out if I should blow him or push him around in a stroller?