Ashlee Simpson is tired of rumors that her father, Joe Simpson, controls her and her sister’s careers. Although he’s widely thought to be a control freak, Ashlee claims that he is not as involved with her decisions as people think. She also says Papa Joe treated her with respect and didn’t lecture her when she was videotaped at a McDonald’s restaraunt intoxicated, asking a fan to kiss her feet and climbing on the counter. She said,
My dad could have been really mean to me about that, and he was so nice. He treated me like an adult.”
She may or may not have said that last quote with a pacifier in her mouth while shaking a rattle, we don’t know. The sock puppet that Joe Simpson uses may not tell them what color lipstick to use, or advise that reckless anal can cause a yeast infection, but you better believe it controls – everything – else. Ashlee and Jessica are so devastatingly dumb that if they found a magic lamp, the genie could trick them into using their wishes to free him and to take turns going down on him. He wouldn’t even need a sock puppet … just Joe Simpson’s voice and a picture of a kitten.
In case you didn’t see that video of Ashlee making an ass out of herself at McDonald’s, click here for the video of Ashlee making an ass out of herself at McDonald’s.
Ashlee out shopping a few weeks ago (“neigh”):