Paris Hilton’s Boyfriend is Above the Law

Here’s a little follow up to the Paris Hilton car crash story I wrote about last week. Thankfully, somebody at the LAPD was smart enough to launch an investigation to determine whether or not the officers who pulled over Stavros Niarchos who was at the wheel Hilton’s freshly crashed Bentley should have detained him and administered a sobriety test instead of letting him go. You know, if it wasn’t enough that Talan Torriero was overheard on the video saying he was “the only sober one” within earshot of the police officers, the fact that he got behind the wheel to take over driving duties should have really brought the point home (note the pictures below). It also seems as though the strict California seat belt laws don’t apply to Hilton and Niarchos since they were allowed to drive away with Hilton straddling her boyfriend in the front seat of the car.

On second thought, let’s not encourage those two to wear seatbelts. It’s not like I’m wishing death on them. They’re like cockroaches. They’re gross and unkillable. They’ll just fly through the windshield, bruise a little and teeter on their backs until somebody kicks them over. Paris is pretty comfortable on her back anyway. Oh yeah, I went there!