The future in-laws hate Tom Cruise

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MSNBC is reporting that the diminutive Mr. Cruise has few fans with the last name Holmes these days:

Katie Holmes’s dad is said to be “very upset” because his unmarried daughter is pregnant with Cruise’s child. And, what’s more, the devoutly Catholic Martin Holmes reportedly is none-too-thrilled about his daughter’s involvement in her husband-to-be’s controversial religion, Scientology.”

It’s nice to see that someone in the Holmes family has some semblance of good judgment, albeit stemming from religious zealousy. If Katie were my daughter, I wouldn’t have to blame my hatred of Cruise on my religious convictions, I would just tell him that his movies have all sucked since that one with the hookers and the Porsche, and for that reason alone I will have to kill him if he ever speaks to anyone in my family again. Then I would beat him with his own belt, a la Fargo, so he would remember the conversation through that Scientologist haze he lives in.