Preston Michael Spears Federline is one day old

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Britney has now named her son and the days when she was going to name him “Charlie” or “Vegas” seem almost charming in comparison to Preston Spears Federline. The Cliff Notes version of yesterday from the New York Post

Spears became mother of a bouncing baby boy named Preston Michael Spears Federline. Spears and her husband, aspiring rapper Kevin Federline, were rushed to the UCLA Santa Monica Medical Center with a police escort, according to Us Weekly. Six hours later, Spears gave birth via Caesarean. This is Spears’ first child, but Federline’s third – he has two kids with Shar Jackson, whom he threw over for Spears.”

I’m borderline amazed she even released the name of the kid, and didn’t wait for the bidding war to commence so she could whore out the last remaining shreds of dignity between these two. Is there any doubt the aspiring rapper spent more time last night on the phone with tabloids and a roll of film in his hand than he did with the baby. And that the kids first words are gonna be “I aint playin, yo.”