Paris Latsis has dumped Paris Hilton

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Just to follow up our Paris Hilton post earlier, Radar Online today quotes a source very close to the Latsis family who says that Paris 1 and Paris 2 have officially broken up, the engagement is over and the two are no longer a couple, and in fact haven’t been for months.

(Their demise) began in July, when Latsis reportedly took his bride-to-be to meet his parents, only to be preempted by an expose on Hilton that included highlights from her sexual resume. The Latsises, a staunchly conservative Greek Orthodox family that until recently was sheltered from the media whirl, had dismissed talk of Hilton’s sordid exploits as ungrounded gossip. But when embarrassing articles about her began appearing in their local papers, they decided to take a closer look. “

At this point Rick and Kathy Hilton flew to Greece to meet their new In-Laws:

After Mrs. Latsis found out what was going on, she quickly hopped on a boat and refused to meet with them. For their son to even think of marrying such a woman is an insult to the entire family.”

My own source inside the Latsis family reveals that the family would prefer if Paris rekindled his affair with his previous flame, a male goat who had been dead for 6 weeks. My source said:

We all really liked the dead boy goat. It smelled better than Paris Hilton, and he was a better conversationalist. Sure we had to prop the goat up in a chair and hold him in with straps so he wouldn’t slide under the dinner table, but we had to do the same thing with Hilton. We don’t normally advocate gay animal necrophilia, but dating Paris Hilton was just too much. I don’t mean to judge, but that’s just embarrassing.”

Source and much more: Radar Online

Thanks for the link to loyal reader Drew, who is opposed to gay animal necrophilia, regardless of what the cool kids are all doing.