Eva Longoria is little

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Thanks to that smart ass judge with the God complex and the sensitivity classes that followed my incident at the zoo, I know that Eva Longoria isn’t technically a midget, but unless these pictures were taken in some novelty oversized house, I’m still pretty sure I could carry her around in my pocket. I knew she was little, but jeezum, even if she knew that cool Apache Chief spell and could grow ten times bigger it still doesn’t look like she could reach the peddles on a human sized car. Her adorable feet would just sexily dangle over the edge of the seat, her hard tan legs flexing and stretching, erotically kicking for the brake and she hotly rams into a tree.

I don’t really know where I was goin with that.