Bella Hadid Is Still TryingBy toddMay 26, 2017
Bella Hadid Is Still Trying

 

Bella Hadid also went to Cannes for some reason, and she did her thing again where she’s kinda sorta naked so people will take pictures of her when they’d rather be taking pictures of her hot ass sister. These are those pictures.

 

  Bella Hadid also went to Cannes for some reason, and she did her thing again where she’s kinda sorta naked so people will take pictures of her when they’d…

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Bella Thorne & Scott Disick Are Done AlreadyBy toddMay 26, 2017
Bella Thorne & Scott Disick Are Done Already

 

Bella Thorne is a mess. Here’s another story about that.

Well, that was short lived. Bella Thorne tweeted that she’s over Cannes, France, on Thursday, May 25 — just one day after she was spotted making out with Scott Disick. The same day of the Famous in Love actress’ tweet, the self-proclaimed Lord was spotted moving on with his ex-girlfriend Chloe Bartoli.

As previously reported, the 19-year-old actress made headlines when she was first spotted with Disick at Catch L.A. on May 15. The two then sparked rumors of a romance after jetting off to Cannes on Tuesday, May 23, where they packed on the PDA and got cozy while lying by a pool.

“Rumors of a romance”? They were banging for like 10 days. I don’t recall seeing them skipping in a meadow. He had his hands on her ass for a while then moved on. It happens.

 

Memorial Day #fbf

 

  Bella Thorne is a mess. Here’s another story about that. Well, that was short lived. Bella Thorne tweeted that she’s over Cannes, France, on Thursday, May 25 — just…

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‘Wonder Woman’ Had A PremiereBy toddMay 26, 2017
‘Wonder Woman’ Had A Premiere

 

The bar is pretty low, but according to early reviews, Wonder Woman is the best DCEU film to date. And that’s awesome. Wonder Woman can beat the living shit out of Batman and Superman (Google it) , so maybe that’s why Superman whines a lot and Batman does Crossfit montages. The film had its premiere at the Pantages Theatre in Hollywood last night, but it’s also having a women-only screening at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin, Texas.  You’ll never guess who is upset about it!

That didn’t go over well with some men, judging by the comments on the theater’s Facebook page. “Apparently ‘equality’ is only selective nowadays,” one person wrote. “How about a ‘men’s only’ showing of a movie or is that not how equality works?”

Good lord, just shut up. Can you shut the hell up? If you’re this angry about women being somewhere without you and want to be around a bunch of dudes, go join ISIS, dipshit.

 

  The bar is pretty low, but according to early reviews, Wonder Woman is the best DCEU film to date. And that’s awesome. Wonder Woman can beat the living shit…

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Some Kardashians/Jenners Are In CannesBy toddMay 25, 2017
Some Kardashians/Jenners Are In Cannes

 

Kourtney Kardashian and Kendall Jenner (and I think one of the Baldwins) are in Cannes for some reason. The last Kardashian movie came out in 2007, so I guess they’re just there to support the latest in cinema. Or be on a yacht. I think they’re just there to be on a yacht. Sounds like fun. I wish I was on a yacht. The news tells me that Kourtney has a new boyfriend or fuck buddy or whatever. That’s neat. Her babies daddy is banging Bella Thorne. Or is trying to bang Bellla Thorne. It remains unclear. Meanwhile, Kendall Jenner remains the hottest thing Ryan Seacrest has ever produced. Not sure where Khloe and Kylie are. I assume Kylie is wrapped in bandages and Khloe hasn’t been fully socialized to be around sea animals.

 

 

  Kourtney Kardashian and Kendall Jenner (and I think one of the Baldwins) are in Cannes for some reason. The last Kardashian movie came out in 2007, so I guess…

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Tom Cruise Hasn’t Been In The Same Room With Suri Cruise For 1,346 DaysBy toddMay 25, 2017
Tom Cruise Hasn’t Been In The Same Room With Suri Cruise For 1,346 Days

 

Tom Cruise was last photographed with Suri Cruise in September 2013. Ten Mission Impossible movies have been released since then.

Tom Cruise was just miles away from his daughter, Suri, on May 20 and did not set up a visit with her, In Touch is reporting exclusively. The actor attended an event with fans to promote his new film, The Mummy, at the Hollywood and Highland Center in LA. While Tom gushed about his work, his daughter, Suri — whom he hadn’t seen in person in 1,346 days — was just 23 miles away in Calabasas with her mom, Katie Holmes. But instead of visiting his little girl, 11, when the event ended, Tom hopped on a private jet to Australia to continue promoting the film. “Tom could have easily made the trip to see Suri. It only takes about 30 minutes without traffic. It would’ve only added a few hours to his busy schedule”.

I would say something about Scientology, but we shouldn’t spew hateful rhetoric against Scientology or peaceful Scientologists might also abandon their kids. Am I doing this right? Let me know.  All good. Suri probably thinks Jamie Foxx is her dad now anyway.

 

  Tom Cruise was last photographed with Suri Cruise in September 2013. Ten Mission Impossible movies have been released since then. Tom Cruise was just miles away from his daughter,…

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Ariel Winter Is Very SubtleBy toddMay 25, 2017
Ariel Winter Is Very Subtle

 

Ariel Winter posted this pic on Instagram yesterday where she gave a shout out to her boyfriend, new friends, and stairs. Very sweet. But remember, this is Ariel Winter so this candid picture was taken 45 times before she was satisfied with her butt’s placement to ensure it was the most important part of this picture and the actual reason she posted this pic in the first place. Whether it be stairs or a casual event, Ariel Winter really wants you to know she was there. Specifically, her ass and boobs.  That’s her thing now. Cool.

 

  Ariel Winter posted this pic on Instagram yesterday where she gave a shout out to her boyfriend, new friends, and stairs. Very sweet. But remember, this is Ariel Winter…

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‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ Has A New Trailer With Donald Glover In ItBy toddMay 24, 2017
‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ Has A New Trailer With Donald Glover In It

 

The third trailer for Spider-Man: Homecoming dropped today, and I don’t it’ll be as good as a DC movie. There isn’t a Queen song and Peter Parker doesn’t hate his job or have a Jesus complex and the jokes don’t seem forced. I’m sure the critics will get hard over it, because they all just seem to like enjoying going to the movies and not wanting to self-harm trying to makes sense of what the plot is supposed to be. This movie might be better after the Ultimate Edition comes out I bet.

 

  The third trailer for Spider-Man: Homecoming dropped today, and I don’t it’ll be as good as a DC movie. There isn’t a Queen song and Peter Parker doesn’t hate…
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Katy Perry And Other People Are Performing In London This WeekendBy toddMay 24, 2017
Katy Perry And Other People Are Performing In London This Weekend

 

Two days ago, a suicide bomber blew himself up after an Ariana Grande concert, killing 22 people (mostly kids) and wounding 59 others (also, mostly kids), in Manchester. After that, the UK raised their terror threat to critical. But good news, everyone. Katy Perry and The Chainsmokers are coming to perform this weekend. Be sure to head out with your kids and loved ones.

Katy Perry, Lorde, Lana Del Rey, Imagine Dragons, Shawn Mendes and The Chainsmokers are not bowing to the terrorists, because they’re fully committed to performing in England this weekend … with an asterisk.  They’re all performing at the BBC Radio 1’s Big Weekend Saturday and Sunday, and all have pledged to take the stage as planned. Here’s the rub. 50,000 people are expected to attend, and the fan base is young … similar to the crowd at Ariana Grande’s ill-fated concert. Our sources say the various teams representing the artists are working with the venue to ramp up security in a huge way. We’re told security was already at red alert level, but it pales by comparison to the new plan keeping the venue and the crowd safe.

Pretty awesome of them to not bow to terrorists by getting 50,000 people together in a confined area in a country that just pretty much accepts getting shredded by a nail bomb as just another day in the life. Because haven’t you heard? Love conquers all. Hugs not hate will defeat terrorism. That must be why all those victims from Monday have come back to life. Too bad if you don’t believe that. You must be racist. I feel so sorry for you. Something about Timothy McVeigh and The Crusades and George Bush.

 

  Two days ago, a suicide bomber blew himself up after an Ariana Grande concert, killing 22 people (mostly kids) and wounding 59 others (also, mostly kids), in Manchester. After…

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Taylor Swift Can’t Help HerselfBy toddMay 24, 2017
Taylor Swift Can’t Help Herself

 

Earlier this month, we learned that Taylor Swift has been secretly dating Joe Alwyn. Joe Alwyn is a 26-year old British actor who still lives with his parents. Joe sounds like a millennial icon Stop me if you’ve heard this before:

A source said: “Taylor and Joe are the real deal, this is a very serious relationship.”

Apparently we know this because The Sun “leaked” it.  We also know that the only person who has ever managed to pull off leaking something on Taylor Swift without an instructional Power Point presentation from her PR and legal team is Kim Kardashian. After this news “leaked”, this was the followup:

We’re told she’s obviously a little “bummed” that the news of her relationship got out. However, the insider said, “At the same time, she is really excited about being with Joe and is hoping she can relax a little bit more now and just enjoy being with him.”

lol k. Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston broke up in September. Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn started dating in October. Taylor couldn’t wait to get this shit out. She would have posted a pic on Instagram of Joe putting costume on her cat last Halloween if she could have. She had to stab herself in the thigh with her keys every time they wore matching outfits and she opened her front camera or this narrative would’ve been destroyed.

“Taylor has been insanely private about her relationship with Joe,” a source tells PEOPLE exclusively about the couple, who have been dating for several months. “She wanted to get to know him without any chaos. She has learned from the past.” Jetting in under the radar and reportedly renting a house in North London, Swift is determined to keep her relationship out of the spotlight — and so is Alwyn.

Yet here we all are reading about it. And the whole “- and so is Alwyn” is super cute like he has any fucking say in this at all. Her PR team probably put a black hood on him, threw him in a van, and has doing red carpet prep right now.  We all know how this is gonna end. Joe isn’t gonna text back one day within the timeframe stipulated in his signed agreement and Taylor will break up with him (and we’ll know about it the next day via her PR team), then 6 months later she’ll have a new album called, Songs With Thinly Veiled References to Joe Alwyn, since she has to go through men like tampons and still play the victim. Pretty sure this is some sort of preexisting condition.

 

  Earlier this month, we learned that Taylor Swift has been secretly dating Joe Alwyn. Joe Alwyn is a 26-year old British actor who still lives with his parents. Joe…

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How You Doin, Elizabeth Olsen?By toddMay 23, 2017
How You Doin, Elizabeth Olsen?

 

Elizabeth Olsen attended ‘The Square’ premiere in this dress, and realistically, I could just stop here, but remember when Tom Hiddleston wanted to get a joint Facebook account with Elizabeth Olsen and she just wanted some set dick then he broke up with her? Then he started dating Taylor Swift? Dude ain’t too bright, huh?

 

  Elizabeth Olsen attended ‘The Square’ premiere in this dress, and realistically, I could just stop here, but remember when Tom Hiddleston wanted to get a joint Facebook account with…

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